Posted: October 1, 2003 in Prior to 2006

Here I sit again… same ol’ same ol’.  If you had to pinpoint a weakness or problem in your life, what will it be?  Sit down, close your eyes, block everything out of your life, and then answer this simple question to yourself.  Not that simple is it?  Is it a bit more complicated than originally thought?  It is easy to give a list, but when you have to mention only one, then it gets harder.

I think one of my biggest problems or flaws I have, is that I have difficulty to let people close to me.  Thanks to all the pain I experienced in my past, I think I am afraid of getting hurt again – friends or loved ones.  This week alone I pushed away three of my closest friends.  Some were the best under the sun.  I will not beg to salvage the friendship, as I know they are likely to be better off: fewer complications in their lives.  I just wish I knew how to overcome this.  There are really amazing people in my life.  The way I act or react with them might give them the wrong impressions.

If I keep this up, I will not have much left.  I know I need help, but I don’t know where to look.   If I had all the answers to my endless amount of questions, wouldn’t that be something?


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