My Only Escape

Posted: January 1, 2001 in Prior to 2006

My name is irrelevant as this was originally started and written not for other people to read.  It was just put down on a document just to act as a release valve for myself. It is very weird for me to admit that I started writing something like this.  This is neither a diary nor actual memoirs.  It is more like memories, ideas and thoughts that I have in the early times of the mornings when I have a little case of insomniac invasion.

Initially, this document was not written for others to read, but a few friends requested that I post this on a blog.  And to be honest, it is almost certainly just fair that I share this with my friends.  If they are true friends, they deserve to know everything about me.

There is not really much of a structure to this document, but I will add an ‘Index’ word in front of each entry. As I mentioned before, this is not a diary, so do not expect timestamps anywhere.  The only time I make exceptions to this rule, is when the date is of importance.  Furthermore, as this was written not originally written for others to read, but when I am about to break a promise I made myself, I want to have something to remind me of that promise.  In other words, screw the spelling, format and grammar.  It might sound melodramatic, but I do not care how it sounds.  I know why I do this.

Another thing I would like to mention… here is no chronological order.  It is thoughts in my mind and my mind sure as hell is not chronological so I will make entries here according to the thoughts on my mind on that instance.

Furthermore, you will not see me mentioning any names.  The reason is that if it happens that someone should read this, then at least I know their privacy is still intact.  Moreover, I know I will say things in this little weird and whacky document of mine that will scare people off or even offend people I know.

Yes! Scare people off.  In this document, I am open… and yes I meant open.  I know I do not open up to people, but since this is not really a person, just a screen on a computer, it is easier to open up.

In a nutshell: This is me… just me.  This is the only place where I feel safe.  I might mention feelings, opinions and other stuff friends should not know or would prefer to hear… and I know myself, I play with words and that by itself cost me a few valuable friends and relationships.  Not to mention that I am quite a difficult person to understand and misunderstandings will be my downfall.

I have a lot of issues I know 🙂

PS.  When there is a song that has been released while I make an entry, I will try to add the Artist and Title.


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